Blowing The Big Butt Bugle

I've been going to Pilates for months and I really love this class. When I first started I was in the back of the class struggling with the most basic moves such as The Hundred or Swimming. Now I'm in the front of the class and I can successfully do a Roll Over with a Jack Knife. Our instructor has even started including a Pilates Ring and light weights into our work outs to challenge us. I love it.

There are always some new people coming into class and most struggle the way I did. I give them credit for keeping with it. I'll even let the occasional barking spider slide. As I've said before, I've been going to Pilates for months and I can count on my hands the number of times I've heard someone pass wind and I couldn't even tell you who did it ... up until yesterday.

Flatulence man has attended this class 3 times already and I've listened to his Hmmmming and Haaaing as he struggles through the moves. I often want to roll over to him and tell him his form sucks and that is probably why he is having a difficult time but instead I tune his noises out. So as we are doing a Double Leg Stretch I hear a Pffffft come out of his direction. I ignore it. Then I hear another ... rrreeeeeep. This is quite ridiculous. Two in a matter of minutes? Then I smell the faint odor. Oh for crying out loud. Really?! I might be able to handle a little ass thunder but not a stinky one. Yack!

I just hope this incidence has either scared him into returning to Pilates or has forced him to put a cork in it.