Happy Mother's Day Mom

Dear Mom,

The first week of motherhood was unbearable. It wasn't at all what I had anticipated it to be like. I was sleep deprived, sore as hell, and flooded with emotions not of indescribable love, but feelings of inadequacy.

I can't thank you enough for being there to help me that first week. And the second week. And half of the third. Or coming to my rescue after my first week alone with her. You were more than just an extra set of hands. More than a cleaning lady or cook. You were the person I vented to, the shoulder I sobbed on, the expert I ran to. You still are. I couldn't have made it through these last five months without you, or the many, many more years to come.

I never thought I could love this way. My heart grows every day for this little girl. I finally understand what it is like to really love someone unconditionally. It made me think of our relationship, and what a little shit I've been.

I'm sorry for all the rotten things that I've said and done over the years, for all the times I never apologized, and for all the times I broke your heart.

I wish that it didn't take me so long to realize what an amazing Mother you are. I guess I just needed to become one myself to truly understand what it was like.

So on my first Mother's Day, I wanted wish you a Happy Mother's Day. I wouldn't be the Mother I am had it not been for you.

All my love,

Erica