29 FOREVER!

 I don't know why they call it a pregnancy glow. It's more like the pimple rebellion. I have never had so much acne in my entire life. Seriously, an atomic bomb would not put a dent in what is going on on my face.

I "heard" it was suppose to clear up in my 2nd trimester. Well, 3 weeks in and no such luck. It actually got worse. Well, it decided to move, and by move, I mean it started to not become so oblivious on my face and more obvious on my neckline and behind my ears. Who gets a pimple on the back of their ear?! This girl does. It's ridiculous. I would cry but somehow I didn't get the emotional rush of hormones with this pregnancy. I've got a cold heart of stone.

So after this new phase of acne emerged I ventured out to the dermatologist. Maybe they had a spare face I could borrow until the end of this pregnancy. I struck out again! They can't prescribe me anything, and almost everything they told me to do to clear it up I was already doing.

To make matters just a wee worse, the doctor asked "How old are you?" I replied, "29 FOREVER!" Okay, so I really didn't but, I totally was thinking that as I said 30. "Oh, well, welcome to the new age bracket. We need to start using anti aging products now." We? Was there someone else hiding in the room? Who was she talking to? I'm 29 FOREVER! Apparently I will be 29 forever with wrinkles and zits though. What a bad combo. Like, really, really, really bad. Does that even happen? Knowing my luck I'll be the one documented case when I'm 40. Caption will read "She thought she would be 29 forever."

 So I bought my first anti aging product. Being not wrinkly is expensive.